[Open Log] But I reached and you were gone

[rustyhonesty]

WHO: Jean & Open
WHAT: Processing his feelings through training, work and art
WHEN: December
WHERE: Around Nightwake
WARNINGS: blanket warning for Attack on Titan related matters of titans, death, war and such.


Just a Moment to Grief
[Semi-Closed to CR]

[Start of December brings him bad news, so he's mostly found from home, in Sunwaning. His best friend lft the world, only to be dead back home. While he made a promise that he wouldn't let this break him, he did feel like he did need to take a moment to feel bad. Sad. ... mad at the world for not being able to keep him here.

He had only talked about it with his wife, Mikasa. He didn't really feel like talking about it more than that. It would be like opening himself up for more pain. Making himself vulnerable on purpose.

Of course he wouldn't turn down visitors, but his heart wasn't quite in it to play a good host.

But at least the three dogs (a husky, a samoyed and a pegasus puppy akita inu) were welcoming to anyone and hoping they would help cheer Jean up. Their other pets weren't as active on coming to strangers, but they were around somewhere.]


The Training Montage


A; Dayrise, Grand Coliseum

[It's normal to see Jean training at the coliseum. What's usually something unexpected is the intensity and today that was ranked up to max. It was mostly him venting his emotions through exess use of fire. Punches, kicks, even breathing fire.

He only took a break when he felt like his fuse ran out or someone interrupted him. Whichever would come first.]



B; Random Nightwake Forests

[Another good way to vent his emotions was just to fly with his 3DM gear around the forests. He zoomed past trees with high speed, occasionally making a risky turn or just freeflying without the wires attached to anything. Sure, he was using up a lot of gas, but he had extra magical reloads left to use.]



C; Sunwaning Roofs in the evenings of 3rd - 5th

[Full moon made him restless. These three nights he had his wolf ears and tail, his claws and fangs and he felt the need to move. So he took off in the evening, running across different roofs in the district he lived in. Parkouring as a werewolf seemed to help him give his inner wolf something fun to do.

If he needed a break he would remain on a roof to watch the night sky, a pitiful whine escaping his throat.]



D; Titanic Dome

[What's training without new skills? Late in November, Jean bought the Potion of the Dragon Lord. It was about time he took it.

Once he did the first transformation came to him without needing to concentrate. It felt weird. Nothing like the animal transformations so far, but not too unpleasant at least. It was a slow progress, considering how big the change was.

The best way to describe the form was that it was pretty long. It wasn't an eastern style dragon, but long was still a good way to describe it, even if most of the length came from his tail. The color of his dragon was close to ocean green and he had pretty standard horns and wings.

Good thing he chose the Titanic Dome for the test run. He could fit here pretty well. Now he just had to figure out how to move in this form...]

Careful down there. I don't know how to move my body yet.

[His voice was strangely loud, but recognizable.]



Workaholic


[If Jean wasn't training, it was likely he was working. One of the places was in Sunwaning, in Volcanus. There he mostly on weapons he would enchant later when he was feeling better, leaving anything more complicated to when he had the mind to think about them.

If it wasn't forge work, he was likely in Frostreign, in Odyssey, filing out paperwork, planning expeditions or making notes on maps. Even cleaning the headquarters while trying to do so when two owlcats were trying to get his attention.

Or he could be in the Amberfall Library, reading something about something related to work or training.]



Art Theraphy

[Eventually worst of his feelings calm down. He can start honoring the promise he made Marco. The promise of not let this destroy him or anything he's achieved.

This is the moment he takes his sketchbook with him and sits in any of the scenic spots in Nightwake: The Blossomcrow Park, the zen gardens in Sunwaning, the fountains in Dayrise, the lake in Solarpeak, the snowy forests of Frostreign. Any of the districts could hold a spot he wanted to draw.

It was peaceful. And perhaps for the first time in a while, he was able to smile all by himself.]

Comments

ME I MEAN MI FIRST

[callyourname]

but you know, remind me to give u more than a placeholder faster than I've done that with Usagi elsewhere... No but seriously maybe I'll edit this while you sleep. Hopefully.

Art Therapy

[ashenrose]

[The patterns of the zen gardens leant themselves to interesting abstract drawings, so Mary was taking the time to wander around and find the best place to start sketching... huh, friend! Hi!

Mary skipped over and sat down next to him. It looked like he was lost in thought for a moment, so she got out her own sketchbook and started to work for all of five seconds before she started chatting.]

What're you drawing??

[rustyhonesty]

[Jean is in his thoughts, but when he realizes Mary is there he smiles. It was always fun to see her, especially when it came to art.

He turns the sketchbook to show what he was drawing. It's the garden before them.]

Just the formations a little bit.

At Home

[corpsewarblade]

[It was tiny emotional support Rowlet Heimdall that noticed something was amiss first. He fluttered over, hopping over to Jean and making a concerned coo, looking up at him to see if he needed the company of something warm and fluffy.]

Huh- Heimdall?

[Following him out... yeah, her brother didn't look well at all.]

...Jean.

[rustyhonesty]

[Jean is sitting at the porch, taking in some fresh air. When Heimdall appears he pats his lap in case the little Rowlet wants to hop there. Then he looks up at Mukuro.]

... hey.

[corpsewarblade]

[Yup, Heimdall's gonna be hopping up onto his lap- before puffing himself up into a fluffy, feathery ball. Perfect for pets.]

Did something happen?

[Mukuro'll go and take a seat next to him.]

Nightwake Forest

[colchismagecraft]

What was that-

[Caster had been out in one of the forests, gathering ingredients for her potion brewing, when something whooshed right past her- wait, not something, someone.

Odd.

But he wasn't the only one who could fly. Let's see if she could keep up- hey, Jean, don't mind the creepy cloaked figure flying after you!]

[rustyhonesty]

[It's hard to see exactly what is chasing him, but he doesn't feel too threatened at least. In fact, it does feel a bit familiar.

So instead of stopping or being too worried about it, he continues to fly at the pace he was going, seeing how his pursuer would react.]

[colchismagecraft]

[He was fast- but the witch weaved in and out of the trees, using the shadows to her advantage as she perused him. All the while, that dark cloak billowed out behind her.

Caster did not attack him or close the gap between them, not yet, but her calculated, smooth movements only seemed to be showing off more of her skill- let's see how he takes that.]

Just a Moment to Grief

[wingbound]

[ It's not that Levi is necessarily keeping that close an eye on everyone he knows is from their world, but considering he's used to seeing Jean regularly -- the training now probably more an excuse to meet and spend a couple hours together rather than necessity -- he still notices the shift. ]

[ Levi's not particularly good with words, but he knows very well what it's like, losing someone close to you whose only chance at life was here. So he has to show his care in some way, even if his usual -- doing things for them -- is likely more than taken care of by Mikasa. ]

[ He'll still bring them both tea and insist to make it, bringing it to Jean as if expecting it to be some sort of cure-all. He offers to clean their house or walk their dogs or help out with the Odyssey paperwork. Realistically, he knows there's nothing that can really help that sort of profound sadness short of letting it run its course, and he trusts that Jean will be fine, ultimately, but that's no reason not to express his sympathy in whatever awkward way he can. ]

[ There he is, setting another mug of tea in front of Jean, as if he truly thinks it can fix anything and everything, though at least he's got one for himself, too, this time. ]

...You know, [ he starts, pretty much out of nowhere, but then the silence between them has always been companionable enough, ] Hijikata thinks they might end up in another world like this.

[ The departed, that is. He's not necessarily optimistic enough himself to believe it, but he has to offer it to Jean, just in case he is. Besides, with everything they've seen here, it's not that far-fetched. He may have received this exact counselling just about a month ago, and while he might not have looked like he was buying it back then, he was listening. ]

[rustyhonesty]

[Mikasa has been his best supporter, but he does appreciate Levi being around. Especially since they've both gone through the same (twice for Levi, without Jean realizing it). They shouldn't have needed to gone through it, but that was the way these worlds worked.

Honestly, Jean had been so lucky during his years in these worlds. Losing the bare minimum of his friends. Ellipsa had really started punching him in the gut about it. Letting him have so many close friends. For what? To tear them away from him?

Jean mentally shakes his head. He knows it's just the initial shock still taking over his thoughts. He would get over this, too, and be fine. He would carry on. He would keep making friends, despite knowing the risks.

Besides, he made a promise.

The tea does at least make him feel better. Perhaps it really was a cure for all. He would just need a lot of tea.

Jean looks at Levi as he talks. Another world, huh? Well, it's not like they had a place to go back home. Jean didn't exactly believe in Paradis having an After Life. Besides, anywhere was better than back home.]

I hope it's not another place they need to start saving.

[He's not completely convinced about the idea, but it's a nice thought, at least.]

Titanic Dome

[snekeyes]

...Jean. I can evade, do not worry.

[Hijikata's Servant travelled to the Titanic Dome from time to time- it was somewhere to think. And if she felt so inclined, it was somewhere she could practice using her Gorgon form in a way she wouldn't harm others... not that she'd ever actually tried pushing that button just yet. Rider wanted to get stronger, though. Needed to push herself.

She didn't engage much with the other visitors, but that was a voice she recognised. Her Master's brother, right... they'd only spoken a few times (and she didn't have quite so many scales the last time!), but she at least tried to be civil.

Besides, what he'd said after his transformation made her a little uneasy...]

Does it hurt?

[rustyhonesty]

[Oh, it's her. Hijikata's friend? Servant? He still wasn't sure what to call her. She looked a little different, but still recognizable, at least.]

No... I'm just not used to being this big.

[He admits this, moving his wings a little bit.]

I guess it takes time.

training montage, A

[dreamsofwings]

They've been sparring for longer than usual, probably both exhausted. There isn't even a clear winner and a clear loser most of the time. Eren isn't distracted by grief, but he's Eren, so he just exists in a weird state at all times. Unlike when he was younger, he doesn't feel any sort of rivalry with Jean. Their friendship isn't always easy, but it's pretty solid.

Which is why when they finally reach a stopping point, he flops down on a bench next to Jean, chugs his water, and just starts talking. How he even became aware of Marco's disappearance is anyone's guess; probably the same way as the others, noticing his messages don't go through anymore.

He wonders how Reiner will take it. Poorly, probably. He can deal with that later.

"You wanna talk about him?" he asks.

[rustyhonesty]

Jean still had some form or rivalry ambitions against Eren, even if it didn't show much due to Eren not responding to it. That was fine, really. He didn't mind the relationship they had now. Still a little bickery, but at least they were clearly friends who trusted each other.

Talking wasn't really something he had planned on. Not because it was Eren he was with, but mostly because he just didn't feel like it. It was rare of him to not want to talk about his feelings, but not unheard of.

He shrugs. "Talking won't bring him back."

dragonnn

[abnormalizes]

Hi Jean! You look great!

[Evangeline, as always, has the best priorities.]

Should I turn into a dragon too?

[rustyhonesty]

[Evangeline has a great timing of appearing whenever Jean is practicing a new form, it seems.]

If you want to...? I'm a little lost on how this form works.

training montage c - ofc i'm choosing this option

[emanation]

{ it's been a long day and despite knowing better ezra actually had taken a chance to go for a drink after work. the evening is a pretty pleasant temperature in certain areas, sunwaning being one of them. not too cold, not too hot--though he doesn't expect to see anyone darting about on rooftops.

at first he heads up because he expects trouble to be coming to the city again, though he's certainly surprised when he sees jean there, the pitiful whine in progress as he steps closer. }

Yo... Not interrupting anything, am I?

has ezra even seen him as a wolf before

[rustyhonesty]

[Ezra's scent is familiar, so his presence doesn't make him tense. His tail wags just a tiny bit because friend.]

No... I'm not dealing with extra energy.

workaholic - volcanus flavour

[assent]

{ sonia makes trips to volcanus every so often, though it definitely isn't as much as she would need if she went on more quests. however, even though she doesn't get herself in danger to need them as often they still need maintenance.

she has her katana and her gun with her today, a small smile on her face as she greets jean when entering. }

Bonjour. I hope you are not too busy?

[rustyhonesty]

[Jean lifts his gaze from whatever he was working on and then shakes his head.]

Not at all. Here to get your katana sharpened?

[He's definitely been more cheerful.]

Workaholic

[mayoninofukucho]

[Hijikata frequents Volcanus for repairs to his weaponry and equipment, and of course he usually uses the opportunity to also catch up with Jean and Mukuro... but today, he can immediately tell that his sworn brother is down in the dumps. Setting his swords and bazooka down (Mukuro can take a look at the latter later), he wonders:]

What's wrong?

[Jean may just be having a bad day, but... something tells him that it's more serious than that.]

[rustyhonesty]

[Jean was just ready to accept Hijikata's weapons for repairs and just go with the day. Instead Hijikata has to be observant and notice something's off.

He could just say he's had a bad day and still refuse to talk about it, but what's the point. It doesn't change anything.]

Marco's gone.

Art Therapy

[urtitan]

[While Jean is capturing the dusk over the Solarpeak sea, Frieda surfaces from the water, having swum up into the shallows. With her pale skin and mermaid tail, she may just resemble an aquatic ghost.]

So you paint landscapes, too?

[She knew that his portraits are beautiful - the one he painted of her and Historia is hanging in the best display spot in her home -, but clearly, his range is wider than that! Her people are remarkable, really.]

[rustyhonesty]

[It's not surprising to see Frieda her, knowing she enjoyed swimming. While he still hasn't completely gotten over their previous problems, he's not in the mood to think about it right now. Instead he just nods.]

Yeah. I tend to switch things up every now and then, on what I paint or draw.