welcome home

[outofoffice]

Who: Venti, Yuri, Saya, Lumine, and Kantera
What: A moment of respite
When: March 4th
Where: A house at the far edge of Blossomcrown
Warnings: Probably mentions of previous game trauma/violence


[ Venti has always been the type who wanders to the beat of his own drum, dipping in and out of people's lives as easily as the blowing wind. But Tokyo-F . . . changed things, somewhat.

Though his initial instinct had been to sleep under a tree and call it "home," an invitation to live with old friends put a halt to those plans. For starters, it would be protection from the unpredictable weather in the segments. For another, maybe he did get used to having a bed and a room to call "home," in no small part because of the teammates and friends who inhabited it with him. Now that solitary tree feels . . . lonely, in a way it didn't before.

And so here he is, standing at the threshold of a house full of people he loves and trusts, who asked him to stay . . . it makes him feel his age, but not in a bad way, for once. Nor does he feel that nagging urge to disappear into the wind.

Should he catch anyone watching him, the pensive expression dissolves into a smile. ]

Hehe, is this the part where we fight over bedrooms?

Comments

[outofoffice]

[ Honestly . . . what's happened that could be worse than the "I'll leave you" conversation? ]

If you tell me to go, I'll go.

But otherwise . . . I'll sit right here next to you in silence.

[sangreine]

If you stay, I'll start talking and that wouldn't be fair.

[ She's angry and hurt but she doesn't want to cost Doctor his friendship with anyone, nor even slightly test them temporarily. ]

I'm not thinking straight, and I'll say something I shouldn't.

[outofoffice]

[ Mmmmm . . .

He hedges his bets and takes a seat. ]

If you're worried the words will burst right out of you, then it seems like maybe they should be said.

[sangreine]

I don't want to make anyone feel even slightly as if they should pick sides. I'm angry and hurt right now, but I wouldn't want that.

[outofoffice]

I have a few millennia's experience in being impartial.

[sangreine]

You're just not going to take no for an answer, are you?

[ She wipes uselessly at her face. ]

He knew before we got married that he might leave me, and just didn't tell me until now. Apparently it being a hard conversation is a bigger priority than me being able to make my own choices about my life.

[ Yeah, she's pissed. ]

[outofoffice]

[ He's a busybody that way! But really, he followed her all the way here; she shouldn't be surprised. ]

. . .

So it wasn't a change in circumstances caused by regaining his memories.

[sangreine]

It was caused when he regained his memories, but he had them all and knew the situation beforehand.

That's what made me think to ask, because he had all his memories before he suggested we go on and get married. He suggested it, I didn't. I thought he'd maybe say it wasn't all clear in his head, or he thought he could handle it and was mistaken, but no. He said yes, he knew, and he didn't tell me because he didn't want me to think badly of him.

And what does he think I'm supposed to do with this now?

-- Before I even agreed to see him in anything more than a casual way, I sat him down and made him watch the memory of that massacre. What does he think, that was easy? That I wasn't scared the whole time? But evidently I'm not worth the same effort.

[outofoffice]

[ He's silent for a long while ]

. . . Wanting to preserve what you have in the moment, even if it's selfish, even if it's doomed . . . it's easy enough to see how something so cruel can happen. Even when we love and trust someone.

What will you do?

[sangreine]

I wish I knew.

I'm upset and furious, but I love him. And I understand how seeing someone you love forget you could be incredibly hard.

I just -- I'm not sure how I trust him again if he could hide something this big.

[outofoffice]

Perhaps you don't.

And if that's the case . . . then you must decide if you can live with that or not. Maybe not right now, but eventually.

[sangreine]

What do you think?

I'm not asking for an answer about what I should do. Just... what you think about it. Am I overreacting?

[outofoffice]

[ Well. If the request is to stop being so impartial for a moment. ]

I don't think you're overreacting.

Telling you he may leave you is more cruel than simply doing it. That it was always a possibility and you accepted a commitment not knowing it is even worse. He knows your insecurities well enough to understand the consequences of this.

[ Actually this is Venti's own commitment-phobic nightmare made real. Fuck that. ]

[sangreine]

Mm. [ She scoots over and plonks her head on his shoulder. Yes her willingness to accept comfort was contingent upon his answer. ]

Yuri said he would drag Doctor back if he ran, but I don't see how that makes it better. If he leaves, I think that he should have to live with the consequences because I'm not doing this every cycle for the rest of time.

That's as far as I've gotten for now.

[outofoffice]

[ Saya . . .

He wraps an arm around her waist and pulls her in as close as he can get her. ]

I'm not sure I'm with Yuri on this one. If Doctor truly wants to leave, he has every right to do so. And if he returned to you because he was forced, and you only found out later . . .

[ Then Saya gets to ride the pain train multiple times! Not on Venti's watch! ]

[sangreine]

[ She will accept being pulled closer, gladly. Part of her was worried she was somehow wrong for how she was reacting, it's nice to know at least someone doesn't think so. ]

Yuri was trying to help, I know. [ But sadly, not helpful. ]

But it's as you said. I wouldn't want him to stay with me out of obligation or because he didn't have the choice to leave.

This sucks. I'd go back to where we were and stay there forever rather than have the people I love betray my trust like this. I know I'm the furthest thing from perfect, but...

[outofoffice]

Well, it's fortunate you're not in charge of such things, since I'd much rather you be here than there. But . . . I understand.

Will you need somewhere to sleep for a while?

[ Or like. Is Doc going on the couch. ]

[sangreine]

...If you and Lumine, or you and Yuri, don't mind the company it would be nice to get some space. I couldn't bear to put him out of our room.

I don't plan to avoid him all the time, but it'll be easier to think without him right there.

[outofoffice]

There will always be time and space for you.

[ Giving her a slight squeeze ]

Just say the word and I'll be there.

[sangreine]

Thank you. [ She deeply appreciates that. And also wonders why she's always making herself a problem Saya you didn't make this problem shut up ]

I might try to spend nights out, too. I can't sleep anyway, yet.

[outofoffice]

Really? . . . At all?

Have you just been laying there in bed all night, then?

[sangreine]

I usually slip out somewhere after everyone else has fallen asleep. I have a bunch of night jobs for now.

I'm sort of like a watch that's been wound too far. Running too fast. Then eventually I'll have something like a human sleep cycle. And then the watch runs slower and slower...

[ Until it stops. Not the most comforting analogy but it's what she's got. ]

[outofoffice]

[ Don't Like That. ]

Would you like company some nights? I know for a fact that there's plenty to do in Nightwake even into the early hours.

[sangreine]

Ah, trying to tempt me with your ability to be a bad influence. I should have known.

It's working. What've you got?

[outofoffice]

I believe the youth call it "clubbing."