If you don't have the guts to ask your crush out don't be mad at the guy who did

[permboy]

WHO: Sakata Gintoki, Edmond, Katsura Kotarou, Hijikata Toshirou
WHAT: I bet you're excited for more Gintama shenanigans. Edmond asked Gintoki on a date in front of Zura, who's realised he may be in love with Gintoki and he's now having Many Feelings about this. Cue ???
WHEN: February 15th (and maybe later, possibly also Feb 14th)
WHERE: About in town
WARNINGS: Gintama

Comments

for Hiji--

[bombdemon]

[ Whether or not Katsura (or Zurako...) has had time for a semi-public crash-out since the asking-out itself, there was definitely enough time to have one in private! ]

[ No matter how many times he tells himself that he's ought to let it be, having decided himself that it's for the best to never speak of his feelings (at the very least, not until they've finished the manga storyline!) and that this is hardly anything new or worth his attention (why did he not feel like this during the Scandal arc, though?) he just can't help but feel like absolute shit. ]

[ But he also doesn't quite feel like sabotaging this. If Gintoki truly likes the guy (since when does he like guys while sober?!) then Katsura should be happy that he's found someone, right? Even if they go on a date and possibly smush various body parts together-- ]

[ Yeah, no. He can not live in suspense like this. ]

[ And so, he's texting the first person he thinks he has a chance to rope into this. ]

Hijikata-dono,

I would like to request your help in a matter of great import.

[ Hijikata does not yet know that this type of a message can spawn anything from "An evil Elizabeth is about to blow up Earth with a laser" to "I'm out of conditioner", but perhaps this will the the start of him figuring it out... ]

[mayoninofukucho]

[Hijikata indeed doesn't have the slightest idea of where this will be headed - a comedic arc or a serious one, for a start -, and there's only one way to find out...]

Can I have some more details? Or is it better if we meet in person to discuss?

[Is it... confidential?]

[bombdemon]

Of course. I have no wish to involve you in a crisis that you are not informed about and prepared for.

[ Again, that is. ]

But it is a rather delicate issue, so perhaps it would be best that we meet. Perhaps I could catch you before work?

[ He'll suggest a time and place that's honestly just short of urgent. ]

[mayoninofukucho]

[A crisis, huh? That sounds serious alright.]

That works. You can come to my place; the boys are out. Unless you'd rather I meet you elsewhere?

[Who knows, maybe he's staking out some ne'er-do-wells somewhere and can't leave his position?]

[bombdemon]

[ Hold that thought... ]

No, that works quite well. I will be there in thirty minutes.

[ And sure enough, he'll be ringing Hijikata's doorbell in half an hour. This time he's dressed in his regular clothes, which probably contributes to the feeling of this being a serious arc... ]

[ He bows his head slightly in greeting once the door opens. ]

I appreciate that you're hearing me out on such short notice. There has been a... development.

[mayoninofukucho]

[The moment he opens the door and sees Katsura, his expression goes from hopeful to... disappointed, almost disdainful.]

Katsura.

[Not Zurako. Nevertheless, he steps aside to let him in. This better be as important as he says. Having had advance notice, he has tea and snacks ready on the same table they sat at on Valentine's Day, and albeit there's hesitation in his body language, he again invites Katsura to sit down with him. (He doesn't pour his tea for him this time, though.)]

Well, then. What's going on?

[bombdemon]

[ Ah. Perhaps he should just stay as Zurako for any interactions with this man. The disappointment is almost palpable, and Katsura isn't entirely sure how he feels about it. ]

[ Maybe he's a little disappointed, too. He really thought they were getting somewhere, what with all the... nonconsensual memory and Gintama spoilers exposure. Especially after how well their Valentine's meeting seems to have gone (yesterday?). But it really seems like Hijikata only has room for Zurako in his heart. ]

[ And as much as Katsura might insist that they're different people at times, in truth, that stings a little. Am I not good enough for you as I truly am? ]

[ Briefly, he wonders if Gintoki might suffer from the same affliction -- the fact that he is, most of the time, a guy. But that doubt is immediately crushed into overwhelming devastation when he reminds himself that he's seeing a guy for dinner. Clearly, that's not a dealbreaker for him. Which means... ]

[ Which means he's just not into Zura. The thought both gives him some odd, self-sacrificial flavor of relief, and makes him want to cry violently into the nearest pillow. ]

Right, yes.

[ His posture is somewhat stiff by default, but now he straightens his back further and turns to stare at Hijikata soulfully for a few long moments, as if he's seen the horrors or is trying to look at his very soul. ]








Gintoki is going on a date. [ grimly. ]



[ SO MUCH FOR A SERIOUS ARC-- ]

[mayoninofukucho]

[Look, it's really hard to reconcile the gentleness and kindness Zurako has shown him, much as it was a means to an end, and the heroic deeds of Katsura in the future, with how Katsura and Gintoki mutually amplify each other's shittiness and cause him more aggravation that either of them would on his own!! It's a struggle!

And Valentine's Day only having been yesterday makes the whiplash hit all the harder!! Having Katsura sit where Zurako sat only drives home how he was catfished all over again... though, in fairness, Katsura's polite demeanour does make it a little easier to bear, to the point where Hijikata almost feels slightly bad for the cool reception. Truthfully, he is a lot more tolerable than Gintoki, at least here in Ellipsa.

When Katsura spills the beans after that long dramatic pause, he initially waits for there to be more...]

...

That's it?

[Seriously???]

Who cares?

[bombdemon]

[ They really do have some kind of a shenanigans feedback loop between them, don't they? Or maybe it's one of those cases where being around someone makes both of your braincells disappear. Hijikata should certainly know about that. ]

[ Well, at least Katsura's here on his own. For now. ]

[ He huffs. ]

I care. As you know, he has been through a lot, and I do not want to see him heartbroken because of-- some-- [ Takes a deep breath, as if it's taking his entire willpower not to say the Bad Word. Probably something like jezebel. ] --lascivious opportunist. I do not trust the man who approached him. In fact, I believe they have only met a little while ago, and the way he was practically hanging off of him, tucking his hair... let's say I know a few things about someone making an effort to get attention.

[ Shakes his head, as if it's totally shameful (when done by someone else). If it looks like Hijikata is about to say something, he will practically tut him with a raised hand, like a strict teacher saying that he's not done talking. ]

Anyway, I would like to observe this "date" and try to gauge this would-be suitor's intentions. If he has truly fallen for Gintoki's... charm, [ said very flatly, like he's seriously doubting its existence ] then so be it. But if there is an ulterior motive to his desperation, I need to know as soon as possible.

[ LOOKS AT HIJIKATA. WIDE DOE EYES STARING EMPTILY INTO HIS SOUL. Is this what it's like to be Gintoki and get drawn into the stupidest of shenanigans? ]

The problem is, I will stick out like a sore thumb if I attend the restaurant alone. I would prefer a subtler approach. Ideally, they would not even notice I was there, unless, of course, my intervention is necessary. So, I was hoping that you would accompany me and act as my own date to keep our profile low while we investigate this anomaly.

[ Finally he stops to take a breath... and look at Hijikata expectantly for his response. ]

For Gintoki

[sapphireknight]

[It is not the first time Edmond has been out for a meal with somebody like this.

Thank every god for that, because if it had been he would have been far, far more flustered about the entire thing. He lets Eiden know where he's going, of course, not without some small amount of embarrassment.

How he's dressed when he arrives at the restaurant is entirely modest by Klein standards while simultaneously leaving very little about the shape of his body to the imagination. His hair is in a simple up-do that frames his face and shows the back of his neck. He put in some effort, though not too much, not wanting to overstate things or look too out of place.

He approaches the other man with a smile once he sees him.]

It's good to see you, Gintoki.

[And Edmond has absolutely no idea of the drama he has been causing in the background--]

[permboy]

[ Since they'd parted ways the day before, Gintoki has waffled between two thoughts: This is totally a date and no this is definitely not a date. For his sanity, he'd eventually settled on the latter and decided they both have the same idea. They want the discount, and this would be decent company.

So there's no point dressing up. He does consider it for a second, then asks himself why the hell he's considering it, then goes to the restaurant in his usual attire.

Seeing Edmond approach, his thought instantly swings back to this is totally a date, and he feels heat rise to his face. Except, no, doesn't Edmond just always dress up? He's always wearing something new and flashy, and hasn't he worn more elaborate things when they've met in the past? It's fine. It's fine! It's totally not a date.

He lifts a fist to his mouth and clears his throat, schooling his face into his usual practiced neutrality. It twitches a little when Edmond reaches him and he realises that that shirt doesn't have a back, and along with the hairdo it really exposes-- Don't look at his skin! Don't think about his skin!

That blush on his face isn't going anywhere any time soon, he can tell, but he's sure going to pretend it isn't there. ]

Yeah, uh. You too.

[ And he immediately turns to march into the restaurant. Food will help! ]